How Beautiful Bleakness Can Be!

I'm layered in wool - head to foot - and can feel the sting of the elements only on my face, only when walking into the wind.  The blessed fur-lined "Mad Bomber" hat buffers the bitter wind making that fierce winter element almost a friend.  Around my waist I wear the rope attaching me to the toboggan, a walking stick provides additional stability and traction as needed.  I advance, like a mule in harness and the load slides along behind me.   I'm leading, breaking trail in the deep snow, Kevin follows in my path.  Soon we will need snowshoes for a task such as this.

Your author, in a photo from a previous winter at the Ravenseyrie Sorraia Mustang Preserve

The horses knew we would come...there they are!  At the edge of the forest, shapely equine shadows move, anticipating the delivery of dried summer.  How beautiful the snow!...so much gentler on the lee side of this particular wooded region of the Ravenseyrie Sorraia Mustang Preserve.

Kevin gathers up the empty toboggans

One last cookie delivered to the young Sorraia stallion, Sedutor, and Kevin turns to head back to the house in the wind and snow

The horses often move from pile to pile...if the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence, maybe the next hay pile is, too!

Sorraia stallion Altamiro, showing striping made of snow and skin folds...I daresay seal skin isn't any warmer a pelt than Sorraia fur must be!

The light in the window of our little home in the wilderness...how welcoming in a storm!

Through the trees, Kevin follows the trail back to the house

Hay distributed, muzzles deep into it, on this morning, I ask Kevin to take my toboggan back with him and leave me to this place for a while.  Under my cape, I unzip my bag and bring the camera out, taking photos while mindfully protecting it from the snow filtering down.

In no time, my hands grow numb...but I have a simple, reliable remedy.  I gather my cape around me and sit in the snow, leaning against a tree trunk.  I fold my arms over my chest and slide hands up sleeves, left to right, right to left, skin on skin, under knitted warmth.  Some of the horses look at me, quizzically.  The sounds of wind gusting in the open seem far away.  Snow melts on my nose, undisturbed.  Somewhere deeper in the forest a Chickadee song rides over the masticating sounds of dried grasses being consumed by our bachelors.  In one sense the world shrinks down to this and nothing more, with a blue shimmer one feels more than sees...yet at the same time my body expands as if it has assumed the width of the entire bluff and beyond.  And my hands tingle with heat.

How beautiful bleakness can be!

 Look there!  What a fantastic composition that is!  The camera and I return to the pleasure of documenting how beautiful bleakness can be.

Not everyday has a wicked winter wind.  On calmer days the horses prefer their hay in the open regions.  And they continue to graze and browse.  No matter how deep the snow, these elemental Sorraia horses (and Jerry the mule and Zeus the Thoroughbred) find extra things to eat.  If no fences existed and the entire bluff were available to them...they would have no need of hay at all.  The landscape provides for all their needs, and while wintertime is not lush with green edibles, it does not leave its wild inhabitants without resources for survival.

When not eating hay, the horses dig for forage beneath the snow

Snow, but no wind, breakfast in the open

Ousado and his herd mates are perfectly outfitted to enjoy breakfast with the snow falling

Some winter days yield up the kind of beauty that can only be found because of the brittle cold, the bleak austerity and challenges of the season.  Yesterday, as the dawn touched the bluff, my camera sought out more scenes of life at Ravenseyrie to share with you...a desire to shift the perception of those readers who feel little but fear and loathing when winter comes.  I want you to see what I see, feel what I feel...winter is a fabulous time of year!

It is -23°C as dawn comes to Ravenseryie

All the colts know Kevin keeps cookies in his pockets for them

Four Ravens in the Zen Elm seem to wait, just as I am, for the sun to come up over the east tree line

Sunrise!

And just then, the Ravens take flight!

Frost, yet untouched by the fingers of the sun

Then the sun reaches out, like a burning fire!

Hawberry bushes covered in frost become something "other" when touched by the winter sunrise

Morning sun casts a warm glow on the horses

Zeus, the twenty-something domestic Thoroughbred wintering well alongside his wild herd mates

Legado, on the move to steal someone else's pile of hay

The amazing Altamiro, glowing golden in the morning sun

Ousado

What a place to be!

And if you are still not convinced that winter is not just a time of challenging elements, but is filled with joy and a sublime lightness of being, have a look at a video clip of Interessado, Silvestre and Legado bursting with the pleasure of being young and free!

Silvestre and Fidalgo

Altamiro erupts in animation too!

Altamiro showing off among his many sons

Altamiro conversing with Interessado

Blow, blow, thou winter wind.      Thou art not so unkind --William Shakespeare

Life is Not a Machine

The Sorraia Mustang Mares of Ravenseyrie on the Twinravens range, Tehkummah, Manitoulin Island, Ontario

Manitoulin Island has kissed goodbye the embrace of a long and glorious Autumn and turned its face to receive the quickening freshness of Winter full on the brow.  After a slight resistance, (missing the feeling of the easy step out of the screen door, free from the burden of layers of clothing) I smoothly roll into the sensations that come with frigid temperatures, early nightfall, treacherous roads and the extra work heavy snow brings.   It doesn't take long for me to remember that when appropriately outfitted - mentally and physically - I am Winter's Lover. 

Having my studio and art gallery closed now on not just Monday, but Sunday as well provides me the option to make my weekly visit to Twinravens to visit with our Ravenseyrie Sorraia Mustang mares on which ever day provides the better weather for the hour's drive to the more southerly sector of the island.

Sunday, November the 24th, dawned clear and sunny with a thermometer reading of -12°C, and very little wind...this after we had rain followed by our first bona fide "snow and blow" on Saturday.  With the roads ploughed and in pretty good condition, Kevin wanted to use this window of opportunity to employ his Kubota tractor's front end loader and sink another huge round bale of dried summer into the back of our old pickup truck allowing us to add to our larder of feed to support the winter forage the Twinravens range provides the virtually wild mares.  I made us some avocado sandwiches and hot tea and we were soon on our way.

Once we reached Twinravens, we went right to the back sector to (groan and grunt and...) roll the bale of hay off the truck and into the more protected area of the range, near where we had run a fence line into the forest to offer the mares shelter from the elements when they so desired.  Then we drove into Mark and Michelle's yard (the lovely couple who provides their wilderness range for the mares' use) and put together portions of whole oats and alfalfa cubes to offer the mares a nutritious treat.  

The mares coming up for treats on a fresh, frozen morning

The mares were keeping off toward the back-centre of their range and rather than expect them to come all the way up, we carried their buckets of treats out to the upper flat region where they used to like to congregate during the summer.  From there I put out my call to them.  Of course Bella (who has assumed the leadership role) had already seen us coming and was trotting our way with her head held high for better vision and with nostrils widely dilated, scented the air to gain feedback on who we were and what our intentions might be.  It didn't take her long to recognize it was her friends, Kevin and Lynne so she moved into a canter with the mares now close on her heels, all knowing a feeding of treats was being offered.  Belina was uncharacteristically coming in lastly, and as she came closer in view we could see why:  Belina had a foal running alongside her!

We were stunned!  

We were elated!

We were also dreadfully concerned...a foal born at the beginning of a Northern Ontario winter is most unusual, and potentially deadly.  

Elation won over, for there she was...this perfect filly dancing over the landscape looking as astonished as we humans!

A perfect new Sorraia filly!

In the spring of 2012, still believing we could provide an autonomous living experience for a family band of wild horses, but recognizing that the offspring were approaching a number the limited available range could not ideally support, we enrolled in the unique fertility control program established by the Science and Conservation Center of Zoo Montana, which was reported to work so well for wild mustang herds in the United States.  

Along with the other Ravenseyrie mares and of-age fillies, Belina received the primer dose, and follow-up booster of PZP which we were confident had been effective in preventing pregnancy as throughout the rest of that year she did not show any signs of carrying a foal, nor did she deliver one in the spring of 2013.  

Photo credit:  Kevin Droski

At the time when we would have been called upon to extend the fertility coverage with an annual booster shot delivered by remote dart, it became apparent with so many young stallions soon to "come of age", the Ravenseyrie preserve could not provide the physical or the mental space for more than one stallion when mares continued to be among them.  The acceleration of aggression among herd dynamics and our discomfort with certain aspects of the PZP fertility control program provoked our decision to separate the sexes.  The females were relocated to the Twinravens range in the spring of this year.  

Belina and her three day old filly and the Twinravens canine, Akina
photo by Kevin Droski

Belina has always been an "easy-keeper" tending towards obesity.    After looking almost slender when first moved to Twinravens I had noted she looked particularly "robust" on my last two visits.  Of course I did remark to Kevin and to Michelle that Belina looked like she could be pregnant, but she did not act the part, and knowing she had been on fertility control for a full year and removed from Altamiro's presence before breeding took place during the 2013 season, it was easy to assume she had simply put on good weight during the summer and autumn on the ample grazing and foraging available at Twinravens.

Photo credit:  Kevin Droski

To deliver a foal at the end of November meant that Altamiro had managed to get Belina pregnant in December of 2012...well out of the usual estrus season for wild living horses in Canada!  Checking in with my calendar, where I chart observances of the activities of the horses, the last heat cycle and breeding by Altamiro I noted were in June of 2012.  Whatever type of off-season estrus Belina experienced, it was much more subtle than what is typical for her and went undetected by me, but obviously was taken advantage of by the amazing Altamiro.

When I sent in my report to the Science and Conservation Centre letting them know that one of our mares failed to receive the full year of protection against pregnancy resulting in an out-of-season birth, I received a reply from Dr. Jay Kirkpatrick, one of the creators of the PZP immune-contraceptive.  I asked Dr. Kirkpatrick if I could quote his response here in the Journal of Ravenseyrie, but have received no follow up reply, so I will synopsis his thoughts on this situation with Belina instead.  

Photo credit:  Kevin Droski

Dr. Kirkpatrick pointed out that out-of-season pregnancies have been observed in North American wild horses even among mares that had not been treated with the immuno-contraceptive, however it is not something that occurs frequently and therefore they do not worry about it.  According to Dr. Kirkpatrick, wild horses that are left to themselves develop compressed breeding seasons in response to the "function of light (photoperiod)" but that there also is a genetic component that is carried forward because foals that are born out of season do not have the same chances of survival that in season foals receive.  Human intervention that supports out of season births therefore creates a genetic trait that extends estrus periods.  It was then suggested if "out of season estrus and ovulation is common" among the Ravenseyrie mares, we should provide "a booster in the fall as well as the spring."  Being a busy man, I'm sure it slipped Dr. Kirkpatrick's memory that I had already informed him  we had separated the mares in the spring and no extra boosters of PZP were needed as we had opted out of the program.

Photo credit:  Kevin Droski

While I appreciate the work Dr. Kirkpatrick and his associates are doing to alleviate the deplorable manmade crisis among the free range North American Mustang horses in the United States, I did not find his response to the situation with our Ravenseyrie mares adequate.  I sent a reply to Dr. Kirkpatrick alerting him to the fact that while what he had relayed may be true for some horses, it was not necessarily true for our horses.  In the case of Belina, all five of her prior foals had been conceived in the spring and delivered in the spring.  The only difference for her in 2012 was that she had been dosed with the immuno-contraceptive, which successfully prevented pregnancy during the usual spring/summer estrus cycles, but failed to carry that protection for the full year.  Had she not been given the immuno-contraceptive, Altamiro would have settled her in the normal breeding period the Ravenseyrie group had established for themselves.  Prior to our participation in the fertility control program, our mares conceived and delivered foals between the months of March and September.  

To my knowledge, the female predecessors in Belina's lineage were all free range wild horses roaming public lands in Washington state, more likely suffering from persecution by humans than supportive efforts that aimed at extending breeding seasons.  If Belina's unseasonal estrus cycle has a human stimulus, it is more likely the PZP's interference and not an inherited genetic component.   I feel it is important for those involved with the PZP fertility control to have the information of how its use played out in the events with Belina.

One week old and doing fabulously well!

That "business" finished, let me take readers back to the situation with Belina and her excellently made filly...

Mark does a head count of the mares each morning through field glasses and relayed that there were not eight horses when he did his check that day.  While the new filly had a dry coat, was steady on her legs and well aware of where to find a warm meal, Belina had frozen blood still clinging to her rear legs.  Michelle reported that the dogs had been out in the field most of the morning...she thought they were playing with the horses (something they do frequently).  Later I saw Nishin pulling on the afterbirth off in a different sector of the range.  It soon became apparent that Belina must have delivered this filly just a handful of hours before Kevin and I arrived.  Marvel of marvels!   How cool is that!?  Belina (whom we affectionally call "Popo") happened to pick a day to deliver her baby that was not only bright with hope, but synchronistically also one that Kevin and I would be coming to visit with her and her herd mates!

With Mark and Michelle stepping in and going out to the field (often twice a day) in the first week to check on the status of that new filly for me, my worries that the wintry weather might prove too much for her to cope with melted away.  Each report Michelle and Mark emailed to me relayed observations that were all completely normal and made it easier for me to be at work when all I really wanted to do was be around that filly and make sure that her environment, her mother and her aunt and cousins would be able to support her as she adjusted to life out of the womb at a less than optimum time of year for newborn foals.  

The Sorraia and Sorraia Mustang horses are amazingly capable survivors!  And why wouldn't they be?  Their inheritance are genetics and instincts that developed in wilderness environments and has (obviously as demonstrated here in Canada) not been weakened by whatever influence mankind has imposed upon them over the centuries.    

Sorraia stallion Altamiro on a frosty winter's morning at Ravenseyrie

Kevin went down to Twinravens midweek to make some fencing adjustments and check in on the newbie, taking photos as well to share with me when he got back home.

When I got to see the mares and new filly myself the following Sunday, I was delighted with how the thick winter coat she was born with appeared even more serviceable than the week before, as if it had grown more lush now that mother's milk and physical activity were daily features of life, as opposed to being folded up in an amniotic cloister.

While your author gives Belina a rump itch, Belina does the same for her filly.photo credit:  Kevin Droski

photo credit:  Kevin Droski

Kevin and I will be heading down to Twinravens tomorrow morning and I am looking forward to perhaps trying out a few potential names on the new filly to see if she finds one acceptable.  

As for the bachelors here at Ravenseyrie...you can see they have adjusted seamlessly to the ways of winter.  And take note how much more snow the East Bluff had during that week than what Mark and Michelle experienced an hour's drive south of us at Tehkummah on our fair island of Manitoulin.

Young Sorraia stallions Destemido and Legado playing boy games at
the Ravenseyrie Sorraia Mustang Preserve

Young Sorraia stallion, Fidalgo at Ravenseyrie

Late day hay at Ravenseyrie

Our smart new filly gets extra warmth in such a position as this!

So it seems fate has determined that there should be two foals born from Altamiro and his mares in the year 2013.  Just looking at the way the year types out:  2013...so futuristic in appearance...and a time when we humans are ever increasing our attempts to manipulate Nature to suit our purposes...it gives one pause to admire that we actually do not control everything..."life itself is not a machine".  There are processes and urgings that manage to find their way around our belief that we are the superior life forms.  This filly's surprise presence among us has me exploring how I can be less manipulative and more cooperative with the natural dance of the five elements that make all we see in this world possible.

"It becomes ever more obvious that the Earth and life itself is not a machine, a steam engine or a computer; that competition is not the primary ordering principle in Nature, and that co-operation is a far more stable and successful solution."  --Adele Getty from the book, GODDESS / Mother of Living Nature

We Enter Mythic Realms

Sorraia filly, Esperanda (Altamiro x Ciente)  shows us a mythic realm

How peculiar it is!  Certain features of one's personal landscape appear "normal", yet a tightening of the innards (slightly alarming) directs your attention to profound nuances of change.  A look over your shoulders reveals the bridge has lost its integrity - there is no going back - yet at the same time moving forward shimmers with illusion.  Feeling momentarily lost, the mind persists in the games of reconstructing memory and organizing/categorizing the future, but now you know these are human constructs and not the ultimate reality.  By and by, you simply withdraw undue attention from manmade ideas and in doing so an awareness of the entelechy of natural processes enriches your senses.  And it feels very good!

I am not sure just what put me into this "peculiar" state of being...a combination of factors most likely:  pulling back from the frequency of social engagements/obligations, dwelling in an austere wilderness environment, observing "wild" horses on a daily basis, experiencing menopause, practicing new art forms, as well as mindfully selecting what I eat, what I read, what physical activities I engage in, etc.  It may not be the lifestyle best suited to you, the readers of the Journal of Ravenseyrie, but it provides well for me, especially in my dealings with the horses.

When Kevin and I made the decision that the purebred Sorraia stallion, Altamiro, and his harem of Sorraia Mustang mares should live in separate environments, it was based on the realization that the offspring they created (19 thus far!) have significantly contributed to the enhancement and safeguarding of the residual "Iberian Tarpan" genetics present in the Sorraias in Europe and the Sorraia Mustangs in North America, and until more public and private conservation initiatives involving these types of horses manifest themselves, it would be unsustainable for our numbers to grow unchecked.  It has proved to be a decision that the horses have adapted well to, with the bachelor group remaining here at Ravenseyrie and the mares and filles living on a range an hour's drive to Twinravens in the southeast sector of Manitoulin Island.

2013 Sorraia colt, (Altamiro x Bella)

Just one "loose end" remained...and that was Ousado...

Ousado is the last foal born at Ravenseryie before the males and females were separated.  This handsome colt by Altamiro and Bella was born earlier this year (March 8th) and accompanied Bella when she was moved to the Twinravens range in April.  We knew that at some point we would be required to either geld Ousado so he could remain with the females living at Twinravens, or we would have to bring him back to Ravenseyrie.  With the conservation of important genetics in mind, we opted to bring Ousdao back home.

I worried a little bit at how we would accomplish this bringing back home of Ousado, especially since he and I had not made a hands-on friendship prior to his going to live at Twinravens.  How would we develop a closer relationship if I could only visit with him once a week for a handful of hours? 

Worries like this by now are like little puffs of agitated wind that quickly pass on by, for I have experienced the teachings of Nisargadatta at work in my own life enough times to feel convinced all will be as it should be and goodness will prevail.

"See your world as it is, not as you imagine it to be. Discrimination will lead to detachment; detachment will ensure right action; right action will build the inner bridge to your real being. Action is a proof of earnestness. Do what you are told diligently and faithfully and all obstacles will dissolve."

"I don't get flustered. I just do the needful. I do not worry about the future. A right response to every situation is in my nature."  --Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj from the book, I AM THAT

It wasn't long, after the mares settled into claiming their new home and making it "horse country" that Bella's colt, Ousado, decided I was a person of interest and he would seek me out to provide itches, entertainment and treats.  A friendship was born and such a friendship as this between a horse and a human can develop into an easy exploration of new situations. Ousado loved attention, and not just from me, but from Kevin and Michelle also.  We played many games with my shawl and brushes and whatever else might be on hand.  And when he grew sleepy and laid down for a nap, I was able to sit with him and pull out the copious amount of burrs belonging to the many Agrimony and Burdock plants that crisscross the Twinravens range.  I was quite confident that Ousado would be ready for a ride back to Ravenseyrie in the autumn and that he would be especially happy to find other young colts to play rougher games with him than what I could engage in.

Ousado, after I've groomed him...burr free for a brief moment in time!

Ousado playing with my shawl

Ousado's delight in playing with the shawl attracted even Pinoteia to come play also!

Autumn arrived and the very first day that Kevin and I had set up our trailer at Twinravens, Ousado jumped in while I was organizing buckets of oats and cubes, taking me by surprise!  I wasn't ready for him yet!  He followed me back out and helped me distribute buckets to the female members of his herd.  He went back in when his mother climbed into the trailer to see what treats were inside, but when she somewhat hastily turned and leap back out, he followed her, a little frightened by things and was not willing after that to have another try.  No matter...we would come back the following Monday and have another go.  It was Bella's comfort with the trailer back in April that convinced Ousado that it was an okay place to come and go from, giving him his first good experience with traveling by wheels rather than hooves.  But Bella would not be returning to Ravenseyrie and Ousado would be traveling solo...so Kevin and I were committed to not pressuring Ousado to climb aboard, but worked instead to create a pleasing, enticing, comfortable feeling so that he would make the choice himself to go for a ride.  When we are moving horses ourselves, we do not use halters and lead ropes or any other means of pressuring/coercing them to get onto the trailer, rather, we prefer to invite them in and allow them to decide if they want to come aboard or not.  In this way, "wild" horses teach themselves how to load and unload from a trailer, based on decisions they make for themselves.

The next Monday, Ousado wasted no time being first at the gate to be let into the portable corral within which the trailer was set up.  We had arrived midday this time and the weather was sunny and warm and after a beautiful morning of grazing Ousado wasn't hungry enough to be interested in entering the trailer to get oats or cubes, but instead stood by Kevin and decided to doze.  In fact, all the mares were standing outside the portable corral in deep states of dozing that went on for more than an hour.  After that they were ready to move off to graze and Ousado of course wanted to go with them.  We opened the gate of the portable corral so he could rejoin them and decided we would try again the following Sunday and the Monday after that if necessary...we would come however many times it would take for him to make the choice himself to board his ride back to Ravenseyrie.

As it happened, when we came on that following Sunday after about a half an hour of goofy playing with stepping in and out of the trailer Ousado was feeling confident and ready to go.  Once the door was closed and he could no longer see his herd-mates, the Sorraia colt became nervous and upset, but after we got rolling, he took a position at the front of the trailer, facing rearward and quietly travelled alone in that rattling metal lorry.

When we pulled into the range at Ravenseyrie, the herd of bachelor horses were no where in sight.  Kevin swung the wide trailer door open and I sat on the edge of it, just feeling the quietude of Ravenseyrie and letting Ousado know that he was safely home and could come out whenever he felt ready.  He walked forward, stopped to sniff me and receive my praise and caresses then jumped off, while Kevin and I applauded him for his bravery.  We should not be too surprised at just how brave this 8 month colt was to make the choice to get on board that trailer by himself...one of the meanings of the Portuguese word, "ousado" is "brave"!

Ousado explores Ravenseryie, looking for his mother

Soon Ousado was off exploring the range, looking more grown up than before, and calling to see if his mother was somewhere out there.  Ousado's calls brought the bachelors out into the open and in no time at all Ousado was in the midst of them!

Ousado runs toward the group of bachelors

 

I had a feeling that it would be okay to release Ousado into the big-wide-open with all the bachelors right away because I sensed Altamiro would be smelling Bella's scent on the young colt and would likely immediately take custody of him and protect him should the older colts get too aggressive.  And that is precisely what occurred.

Altamiro impresses upon Legado that he should not approach Ousado

Likewise, Fidalgo and the other yearlings were not allowed to be too aggressive with their younger brother, Ousado

Altamiro would not even allow the old domestic Thoroughbred gelding, Zeus to be near Ousado!

Knowing Ousado was now occupied with making new friends, I was eager for Monday to come so that I could go to the mares and see how Bella was managing without Ousado.  Our taking away Ousado was not nearly as rough as when Altamiro used violent aggression to forcibly expel his "kids" when he figured it was time for them to be weaned, but it was just as abrupt and final.   I was relieved to find the mares peacefully grazing when I arrived at Twinravens.  They each were eager for my buckets of oats and alfalfa cubes.  It was only after treats were finished when Bella began to wander the range, looking and calling for Ousado.

Bella looking off to the distance...is Ousado out there?

She was not frantic, did not seem worried or anxious.  She desired me near, seemed to appreciate my good itches and the work I did to free her mane and tail from burrs.  Still there was something else I could feel Bella was asking of me, especially when she repeatedly pushed her flank into my hands.  Of course I knew Bella must have a very full and urgent udder of unused milk, but did she really want me to work on relieving some of that tension?  I have never milked a cow before, let alone a horse, especially an untrained wild-living Sorraia Mustang!  Somehow I tried to relay to Bella that I was too afraid to try milking her...but she persisted in pushing her flank into my hands, much the same way she pushes her butt or shoulder into them when she wants these specific regions itched.  So I gave it a try and began milking Bella out there in the big wide open spaces of Twinravens.  She nickered as I worked away first on one teat and then on the other.  But what a mess I made of things!  I was spraying milk all over her, all over me and only managed to relieve a little bit of that taut pressure on her straining udder.  I think I disappointed her, but I dared not try to experiment with firmer attempts to get a good steady stream out of those teats...I was honestly afraid I would hurt her, make her angry if I got things wrong, and so I quit.  She gave me a long sigh and then went off to graze.  It was time for me to leave.  As I wove my way along the lower trail back to Mark and Michelle's yard, Bella followed me walking along the upper ridge, looking exquisitely beautiful.

Ousado's dam, Bella

At the time of this writing, it is one week that Bella and the mares and fillies have been without Ousado's presence among them.  I am interested to see how Bella is feeling tomorrow when I get to go and visit with them again.

Thinking about how different it is now for me when I am with the horses...how uncomfortable I am to even contemplate going about things with them using structured training techniques often means that I am at a complete loss how to proceed when it comes to getting certain things accomplished.  I feel I no longer have any training sense left, but somehow things do get accomplished anyhow.  A couple of days ago, while reading a book titled, ENSOULING LANGUAGE / On the Art of Nonfiction and the Writer's Life, I realized author Stephen Harrod Buhner had written something about the art of writing that seems to me to be speaking also about the art of being with horses.  As you read the following quotes, imagine you are sitting in front of a horse you desire something from rather than a blank page.  The horse represents what Buhner calls the "living book"...

"If you truly are committed, once you sit down in front of the blank page you initiate a process that will unmake you.  There is not a writer alive that has not found that when they write their entire personality moves through a process of destructuring and then a later restructuring.  We enter mythic realms.  Something from out there flows into and through us and it has impacts on us when it does.  It alters the nature of our psychological structure.  It alters how we see ourselves and how we see the world in which we live.  And it allows the 'out there' to come 'in here'.  We, for a time, allow something more ancient than the human to take up residence inside us."

"We hit the wall.  The writing life suddenly becomes very difficult.  Days of struggle ensue.  We keep insisting, hammering at it over and over again.  And slowly, usually with much resistance, we begin to hear what the living book is telling us.  We begin to let go of our certainties.  Begin to listen more carefully.  And suddenly letting go of our human exceptionalism, we truly begin to hear what we are being told.  We engage in a living conversation--we no longer insist on only our own voice being heard.  In consequence we are taken places we never would have found on our own."

I began living with Sorraia horses in a wilderness because I was convinced that the world needed to keep these representatives of a wild horse type from complete extinction.  I still desire the world to take note of what horses like the Sorraia mean to the overall biosphere, but I no longer feel I have to convince naysayers of their relevance and why they should be allowed to live free and wild in various habitats around the world.  Altamiro and the mares and their offspring have taken Kevin and I to "places we never would have found on our own".  The retention of true wild-horse genetics has not been adulterated by whatever admixture of domestic blood their ancestors may have been subject to - their homogeneity and capacity to flourish in virtually wild settings proves this, I feel.  Being among them one indeed realizes we "enter mythic realms"...because of them. the grasses recite poetry, the rocks dance, the wind chants, the ravens perform choreographed air dances.

Of course all these things occurred before wild horses came into my life...but I remained largely unaware (or unconvinced) until I began to "listen more carefully".  Because of the horses, the nature of my "psychological structure" has altered.  It is the horses who have taken me to a that "peculiar landscape" I mentioned at the beginning of this journal entry.  It is the horses who demonstrated to me there were more voices than those of humans which have implicit meaning and essential knowledge...and how when earnestly open, the right action manifests itself when needed and nothing more is required than to "simply be".

You should know...domestic breeds of horses have this same capacity to open us up to the mythic realms...as do dogs, symphonic music, certain relationships of colours, the wind, waves coming to shore, the touch of another being, the dark, deep, frightening shadows of mystery...through these we "enter mythic realms" and discover our authentic selves which have for so long been obscured (cheated) by the marvels of human constructs which we have been cultured to believe are where reality dwells.  A part of you already "feels" this.  It is just a matter of time before you see the bridge, walk across it and realize there is no going back and no going forward and feel completely whole in each and every moment.

Sorraia stallion, Altamiro his son, Ousado...the older tyrant seeming to be unusually tender as they reunite